Training methods working well
Geelong have been working on a new training drill where the all of the players have to run backwards. The regimen was designed to introduce leg strength and has worked a treat..the club has now gone backwards at such a rapid rate that Doug Wade will soon be relisted because even at age 63 he would still be the best forward on the list.
Cats shop to diversify
In merchandising news, the Geelong Football Club will be introducing a new line at the Cats shop at Skilled Stadium. The new Geelong bait shop will be opened at the end of the season with players such as Cameron Ling, Josh Hunt and Andrew Mackie all being on the counter?? No..on the shelf.
The search is on!
The results of all of the soul searching that has gone on at Cat Park in the last two months are in: We don't have a soul. You have to have heart first.
Votes from the Geelong v Richmond game
The votes from the recent Geelong v Richmond game have been tabulated and the Maggots gave themselves the 3-2-1 as they proved to be the most influential men on the ground. Disappointed Qld Rubgy League officials have scrutinised the latest method of throwing the ball as invented by Darren Milburn and have stated that, while innovative, it was hardly throwing the ball so they have passed on the idea. Questions about how Kane Pettifer can plant his hands on the back of an opponent during a marking contest while Cameron Ling can't do the same thing were dismissed by Umpires (and former Richmond) 'coach' (pfft) Jeff Healy, er Gieschen with the comment 'I think you have to praise the officials as it was a top umpiring performance. Only three bounces went directly to the Richmond ruckman'.
Geelong supporters Club
The Geelong supporters club has organised a tour to the Gold Coast to take in the 'Big Four' amusement parks during September. We anticipate that this event will be well attended by happy Geelong supporters who will be spared the September heartache of last year. As an added bonus, club members will be able to watch the AFL Grand Final as some other team wins the premiership for the 43rd year in a row. We appreciate that people dislike change and that this is one thing you will never have to deal with at the Geelong Football Club
Kent to be on TV!
In entertainment news, Kent Kingsley will appear on Ripley's Believe it or Not and someone will give him a football to hold and to demonstrate the kicking style from previous seasons that we remember so well. A little bird told me that Kent's on air kick was accurate and that the host Dean Cain described Kent's guest spot as 'super'.
Costa claims world championship
Geelong president Frank Costa has won the inaugural World Patience Championship held at the Tangiers Hotel in Las Vegas Nevada. The whole tournament was actually an April fools joke to see if anyone would sit at the empty Poker tables and a trophy was to be awarded to the 'last man standing'. Most contestants realised it was a raw deal early on and shuffled out of town but Frank was pushed all the way by a plucky punter from Texas, George W Bush who was waiting for someone other than Australia or Britain to say going to and staying in Iraq was a top idea after all. As Bush left the building Mr Ace Rothstein was on hand to provide Frank with his trophy, Geelong's second cup in this highly successful season.
Skilled Stadium renovations coming in under budget
Geelong Football Club's efforts to remove the Reg Hickey Stand have come in under budget as ungrateful Cats supporters tore down the stand after failing to appreciate Geelong's remarkably consistent form this season. A beaming Mark Thompson refuted that Geelong had 'Bombed' out this season and that the replacement for the Hickey stand was necessary because the Hickey family was too ashamed to continue it's association with the Geelong Football Club
Next game against West Coast
Get ready folks for the next game against West Coast, a team we have had the wood on ever since they came into the competition. With their slow midfield and lumbering ruckman, the Cats are a monty to win this game and should go in favourites with the bookies to win yet again. No sir, we won't be getting ahead of ourselves..we've got 15 other clubs who will do that for us!
See you next week and remember..WE ARE GEELONG!
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FFS!! WHY FARGEN BOTHER??

regards,
REB