Things that make you laugh

[The Dark Knight]

Early this morning/earlier today it felt I was the only one who could access the site (via Tapatalk) and perhaps other Tapatalk users could too? I went onto the Desktop site on Chrome and saw the error message.

[dedja]

Early this morning/earlier today it felt I was the only one who could access the site (via Tapatalk) and perhaps other Tapatalk users could too? I went onto the Desktop site on Chrome and saw the error message.

And you didn’t abuse this unfettered access?

[mighty_tiger_79]

Early this morning/earlier today it felt I was the only one who could access the site (via Tapatalk) and perhaps other Tapatalk users could too? I went onto the Desktop site on Chrome and saw the error message.

I didn't even try tapatalk

[The Dark Knight]

Early this morning/earlier today it felt I was the only one who could access the site (via Tapatalk) and perhaps other Tapatalk users could too? I went onto the Desktop site on Chrome and saw the error message.

I didn't even try tapatalk

You think it wouldn't of worked for you?

[mighty_tiger_79]

Early this morning/earlier today it felt I was the only one who could access the site (via Tapatalk) and perhaps other Tapatalk users could too? I went onto the Desktop site on Chrome and saw the error message.

I didn't even try tapatalk

You think it wouldn't of worked for you?

Just didn't think of it

[RB]

Americans on the internet thinking that India beat them by one run in the T20.

[Corona Man]

My old Iphone 8 literally on its last legs.

Served me well, must've had it 10 + years I guess, probably longer!?

It survived a horrific incident at the G last year. I "may" have been a few beers deep, when it slipped out of my hand, and over the rail of level 4 in the Olympic stand. Crashing to the concrete floor on the 2nd level. I scrambled down to retrieve it, and it was still working. Must have been a 50 foot drop.

The screens got more cracks in it than Soi 6 in Pattaya!

So I have upgraded to the I phone 15.... I also have a work phone Samsung, piece of crap that is.

Managed to transfer data off the old girl onto the new device, how good is that Tech.

Vale Iphone 8.

[The Dark Knight]

My old Iphone 8 literally on its last legs.

Served me well, must've had it 10 + years I guess, probably longer!?

It survived a horrific incident at the G last year. I "may" have been a few beers deep, when it slipped out of my hand, and over the rail of level 4 in the Olympic stand. Crashing to the concrete floor on the 2nd level. I scrambled down to retrieve it, and it was still working. Must have been a 50 foot drop.

The screens got more cracks in it than Soi 6 in Pattaya!

So I have upgraded to the I phone 15.... I also have a work phone Samsung, piece of crap that is.

Managed to transfer data off the old girl onto the new device, how good is that Tech.

Vale Iphone 8.

IPhone 8 was released in 2017, respect that you got that long out of a phone haha! Love it.

[Jim05]

The SA U18’s team. Just absolutely woeful

[wenchbarwer]

The SA U18’s team. Just absolutely woeful

Well, when the head coach picks the side based on what the recruiters tell him to do, what do you expect?

Got blessed with that 2018 team and has done nothing ever since!

[dedja]

Hey am Bays, dunno why you left!

https://www.adelaidenow.com.au/news/sto ... d71a18c8ff

Stolen sex toy hits elderly woman on the head in Palmerston shopping centre

An elderly woman was sipping her coffee when she was struck in the head by a flying dildo, triggering a massive fracas between a gang of youths and bystanders in a Northern Territory shopping centre.

At about 1.30pm on Wednesday, Oasis Shopping Village descended into chaos when four youths on scooters zipped through the shopping centre at speed.

Things turned ugly, however, when the troublesome group hurled a variety of items – including sex toys – around the food court.

An off-duty support worker, who did not want to be named, witnessed the moment an elderly woman was struck with a “fat d--k” to the head.

“They threw two, large rubber dildos – one of them bounced off the floor and the other smacked an elderly woman right in the head,” she said.

“And then the woman said ‘Oh, I’ve just been hit in the head with a penis’, and I don’t know what happened to her because she disappeared.”

Witness Melanie Euhus, 47, said the victim could have been badly hurt by the “massive” sex toy.

“It was probably about 30 centimetres long and it was fat, it was really fat and heavy,” she said.

“It wasn’t normal size that one.”

Several good Samaritans caught the culprits on-site, with bystanders restraining two of the troublemakers who tried to squirm free.

Multiple witnesses said a woman could be seen with a dildo in one hand while using the other to restrain a culprit.

After ringing security, Ms Euhus took it upon herself to clean up the court.

“I’ve gone out to help and one of the ladies who was sitting down having a cuppa turned to me and said ‘that’s not mine’, and I looked down and there was the gigantic, rubber dildo on the table,” she said.

“I asked her ‘are you sure’ before I went and grabbed a bag to collect the dildos while customers were grabbing the kids and restraining them.”

In the 20 minutes that followed, the good Samaritans continued to hold the pair of captives while others cleaned up scattered items allegedly stolen, such as lighters and aerosols, which had also been hurled during the skirmish.

Before police arrived, a woman, who witnesses believe was known to the offenders, berated the pair before leaving the premises with them.

Another witness who did not want to be named said she was “frustrated” that police took so long to arrive.

“(Someone) came out and said they saw the same kids checking cars out outside,” she said.

“They were up to no good, they had heaps of stuff on them that they (allegedly) stole.”

Member for Blain Mark Turner, whose office is located at Oasis, said the situation was a result of a government that was “out of touch”.

“(The government) enjoy peace and quiet at Parliament House while our poor Palmerston seniors can’t even enjoy a cuppa without facing a dildo disaster, while kids are shouting ‘Don’t touch me’ despite the laws,” he said.

“And if that wasn’t enough, we’ve got kids on a rampage, allegedly looting several stores with their parents egging them on, all while zipping around on scooters stolen from a preschool – they even made off with the loot.”

Mr Turner said Territorians might have to take the situation “by the balls” and handle crime themselves.

“If the powers that-be can’t protect us from these rubbery rampages and pint-sized pilferers, we’ll have to grab this whole mess by the balls and sort it out ourselves,” he said.

“The NT is currently like the wild west meets a bad comedy but there’s no sheriff coming to save us.”

Police Minister Brent Potter blasted the dildo skirmish as “unacceptable”.

“This behaviour is completely out of line and it’s absolutely unacceptable what’s happened,” he said.

“No matter where you are, Territorians should be able to go about their day in peace.”

Mr Potter maintained efforts were underway to combat anti-social behaviour.

“This is why we’re investing $570 million extra in the Northern Territory Police Force, which includes 200 more police being recruited,” he said.

“The Lawler Labor government is delivering on its common sense plan to lower crime and improve community safety.”

[am Bays]

I just modelled for them....

[Pseudo]

“It was probably about 30 centimetres long and it was fat, it was really fat and heavy,” she said.

“It wasn’t normal size that one.”

No, it sounds a bit on the short side.

[dedja]

“It was probably about 30 centimetres long and it was fat, it was really fat and heavy,” she said.

“It wasn’t normal size that one.”

No, it sounds a bit on the short side.

Would love to have been a fly on the wall for the editing on this one ...

[Spargo]

Unbackable odds @dedja, @am Bays & @Pseudo were the trifecta posting here ^

[am Bays]

“It was probably about 30 centimetres long and it was fat, it was really fat and heavy,” she said.

“It wasn’t normal size that one.”

No, it sounds a bit on the short side.

[Jimmy_041]

Hey am Bays, dunno why you left!

https://www.adelaidenow.com.au/news/sto ... d71a18c8ff

Stolen sex toy hits elderly woman on the head in Palmerston shopping centre

An elderly woman was sipping her coffee when she was struck in the head by a flying dildo, triggering a massive fracas between a gang of youths and bystanders in a Northern Territory shopping centre.

At about 1.30pm on Wednesday, Oasis Shopping Village descended into chaos when four youths on scooters zipped through the shopping centre at speed.

Things turned ugly, however, when the troublesome group hurled a variety of items – including sex toys – around the food court.

An off-duty support worker, who did not want to be named, witnessed the moment an elderly woman was struck with a “fat d--k” to the head.

“They threw two, large rubber dildos – one of them bounced off the floor and the other smacked an elderly woman right in the head,” she said.

“And then the woman said ‘Oh, I’ve just been hit in the head with a penis’, and I don’t know what happened to her because she disappeared.”

Witness Melanie Euhus, 47, said the victim could have been badly hurt by the “massive” sex toy.

“It was probably about 30 centimetres long and it was fat, it was really fat and heavy,” she said.

“It wasn’t normal size that one.”

Several good Samaritans caught the culprits on-site, with bystanders restraining two of the troublemakers who tried to squirm free.

Multiple witnesses said a woman could be seen with a dildo in one hand while using the other to restrain a culprit.

After ringing security, Ms Euhus took it upon herself to clean up the court.

“I’ve gone out to help and one of the ladies who was sitting down having a cuppa turned to me and said ‘that’s not mine’, and I looked down and there was the gigantic, rubber dildo on the table,” she said.

“I asked her ‘are you sure’ before I went and grabbed a bag to collect the dildos while customers were grabbing the kids and restraining them.”

In the 20 minutes that followed, the good Samaritans continued to hold the pair of captives while others cleaned up scattered items allegedly stolen, such as lighters and aerosols, which had also been hurled during the skirmish.

Before police arrived, a woman, who witnesses believe was known to the offenders, berated the pair before leaving the premises with them.

Another witness who did not want to be named said she was “frustrated” that police took so long to arrive.

“(Someone) came out and said they saw the same kids checking cars out outside,” she said.

“They were up to no good, they had heaps of stuff on them that they (allegedly) stole.”

Member for Blain Mark Turner, whose office is located at Oasis, said the situation was a result of a government that was “out of touch”.

“(The government) enjoy peace and quiet at Parliament House while our poor Palmerston seniors can’t even enjoy a cuppa without facing a dildo disaster, while kids are shouting ‘Don’t touch me’ despite the laws,” he said.

“And if that wasn’t enough, we’ve got kids on a rampage, allegedly looting several stores with their parents egging them on, all while zipping around on scooters stolen from a preschool – they even made off with the loot.”

Mr Turner said Territorians might have to take the situation “by the balls” and handle crime themselves.

“If the powers that-be can’t protect us from these rubbery rampages and pint-sized pilferers, we’ll have to grab this whole mess by the balls and sort it out ourselves,” he said.

“The NT is currently like the wild west meets a bad comedy but there’s no sheriff coming to save us.”

Police Minister Brent Potter blasted the dildo skirmish as “unacceptable”.

“This behaviour is completely out of line and it’s absolutely unacceptable what’s happened,” he said.

“No matter where you are, Territorians should be able to go about their day in peace.”

Mr Potter maintained efforts were underway to combat anti-social behaviour.

“This is why we’re investing $570 million extra in the Northern Territory Police Force, which includes 200 more police being recruited,” he said.

“The Lawler Labor government is delivering on its common sense plan to lower crime and improve community safety.”

NTNews is a step ahead of all the other rags around Oz

[am Bays]

Oasis Shopping centre Palmerston does make Colonades look like Burnside Shopping Centre, just quietly

[dedja]

https://chaser.com.au/national/pandas-r ... -adelaide/

Pandas reject zoo deal after learning they would have to live in Adelaide

A diplomatic disaster during the Chinese Premier’s visit to Australia after the deal to have two pandas living in Adelaide Zoo has been unexpectedly rejected by the pandas.

A representative for Pandas said that the deal was “completely unacceptable in its current state”, referring of course to South Australia.

“We are willing to negotiate in good faith for a more workable deal but currently the request is frankly inhumane. I mean what did we do to deserve to be sent to Adelaide of all places?”

“We may just sit around all day eating bamboo, but even we think that city is boring as hell.”

[amber_fluid]

Hey am Bays, dunno why you left!

https://www.adelaidenow.com.au/news/sto ... d71a18c8ff

Stolen sex toy hits elderly woman on the head in Palmerston shopping centre

An elderly woman was sipping her coffee when she was struck in the head by a flying dildo, triggering a massive fracas between a gang of youths and bystanders in a Northern Territory shopping centre.

At about 1.30pm on Wednesday, Oasis Shopping Village descended into chaos when four youths on scooters zipped through the shopping centre at speed.

Things turned ugly, however, when the troublesome group hurled a variety of items – including sex toys – around the food court.

An off-duty support worker, who did not want to be named, witnessed the moment an elderly woman was struck with a “fat d--k” to the head.

“They threw two, large rubber dildos – one of them bounced off the floor and the other smacked an elderly woman right in the head,” she said.

“And then the woman said ‘Oh, I’ve just been hit in the head with a penis’, and I don’t know what happened to her because she disappeared.”

Witness Melanie Euhus, 47, said the victim could have been badly hurt by the “massive” sex toy.

“It was probably about 30 centimetres long and it was fat, it was really fat and heavy,” she said.

“It wasn’t normal size that one.”

Several good Samaritans caught the culprits on-site, with bystanders restraining two of the troublemakers who tried to squirm free.

Multiple witnesses said a woman could be seen with a dildo in one hand while using the other to restrain a culprit.

After ringing security, Ms Euhus took it upon herself to clean up the court.

“I’ve gone out to help and one of the ladies who was sitting down having a cuppa turned to me and said ‘that’s not mine’, and I looked down and there was the gigantic, rubber dildo on the table,” she said.

“I asked her ‘are you sure’ before I went and grabbed a bag to collect the dildos while customers were grabbing the kids and restraining them.”

In the 20 minutes that followed, the good Samaritans continued to hold the pair of captives while others cleaned up scattered items allegedly stolen, such as lighters and aerosols, which had also been hurled during the skirmish.

Before police arrived, a woman, who witnesses believe was known to the offenders, berated the pair before leaving the premises with them.

Another witness who did not want to be named said she was “frustrated” that police took so long to arrive.

“(Someone) came out and said they saw the same kids checking cars out outside,” she said.

“They were up to no good, they had heaps of stuff on them that they (allegedly) stole.”

Member for Blain Mark Turner, whose office is located at Oasis, said the situation was a result of a government that was “out of touch”.

“(The government) enjoy peace and quiet at Parliament House while our poor Palmerston seniors can’t even enjoy a cuppa without facing a dildo disaster, while kids are shouting ‘Don’t touch me’ despite the laws,” he said.

“And if that wasn’t enough, we’ve got kids on a rampage, allegedly looting several stores with their parents egging them on, all while zipping around on scooters stolen from a preschool – they even made off with the loot.”

Mr Turner said Territorians might have to take the situation “by the balls” and handle crime themselves.

“If the powers that-be can’t protect us from these rubbery rampages and pint-sized pilferers, we’ll have to grab this whole mess by the balls and sort it out ourselves,” he said.

“The NT is currently like the wild west meets a bad comedy but there’s no sheriff coming to save us.”

Police Minister Brent Potter blasted the dildo skirmish as “unacceptable”.

“This behaviour is completely out of line and it’s absolutely unacceptable what’s happened,” he said.

“No matter where you are, Territorians should be able to go about their day in peace.”

Mr Potter maintained efforts were underway to combat anti-social behaviour.

“This is why we’re investing $570 million extra in the Northern Territory Police Force, which includes 200 more police being recruited,” he said.

“The Lawler Labor government is delivering on its common sense plan to lower crime and improve community safety.”

NTNews is a step ahead of all the other rags around Oz

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