by the joker » Wed Apr 22, 2009 10:15 pm
This is from the Herald sun last year,
1. B. Johnson (Western Bulldogs) — Known as the smiling assassin yet the most selfish player to play. Rarely passes and 9 times out of 10 will try and kick the miracle goal. He is far from smiling when he consistently spits the dummy at umpires if not paid soft free kicks.
2. C. Bolton (Sydney) — Mike Sheahan’s love child, rated so high by many, especially Mike, but how hard is it to stop a player when you have the best defensive midfield in the competition ensuring the delivery to your opponent is woeful. Would not get a game in most teams.
3. D. Wells (North Melbourne) — Has been talked about for so long yet will never live up to all the expectations whilst he is still scared of his own shadow.
4. J. Fraser (Collingwood) — Poor Josh, he looks old slow and run down. Has never been a match winner yet now wears the vice captain title. Easily the worst number one draft pick ever.
5. R. Tambling (Richmond) — Actually not so sure this bloke is even rated anymore. Couldn’t find the footy in Rebel Sport, so how it can be expected on the MCG escapes me.
6. A. Carrazzo (Carlton) — Even Carlton supporters laughed when he was named best and fairest. Will never be tagged as opposition coaches look at him as an asset to their team the way he disposes the ball.
7. L. Hodge (Hawthorn) — Unlucky not to be number one. Hates being tagged or winning the hard ball. As soon as he goes forward the opposition has had a win because he will not kick set shots at goal.
8. C. Tarrant (Fremantle) — This bloke could kick 100 one day, I think that’s what I heard early in his career. Unfortunately these days he would be lucky to get 100 kicks in a season.
9. B. Hall (Sydney) — Big bad bustling drop kick. Cannot remember him ever taking a contested mark, in fact recall several chest marks bouncing off his chest.
10. K. Johnson (Richmond) — Ok so he had a good game against Fremantle, but prior to that took the mantle for being the worst captain in the competition after Vandenburg retired from Hawthorn last season.
11. D. Fletcher (Essendon) — Supposedly one of the best full back in the comp, but hasn’t played on a full forward for 4 years.
12. S. West (Western Bulldogs) — Cherry picker that only knows how to handball backwards.
13. P. Everitt (Sydney) — The Swans needed a ruckmen in 2007, after Spider arrived they slipped down the ladder.
14. T. Boyle (Hawthorn) — With Franklin and Roughead in the side Boyle gets tagged by little league players yet still can not take a contested mark.
15. R. Walls (the Age and C10) — Not a player but still worthy for the top 15. The master of stating the obvious is still bitter about not getting a run with Essendon. Embarrasses himself each week with unprofessional commentating.
16. C. Bruce (Melbourne) — Was apparently going to win a brownlow once.
17. B. Rutten (Adelaide) — With 13 other defenders helping him out, he doesn’t do enough.
18. H. Scotland (Carlton) — One clubs reject is another clubs best player.
19. D. Swan (Collingwood) — 30 turnovers a game, see Carrazzo
20. N. Stevens (Carlton) — Or is it ‘mini Lance’?
21. D. Milburn (Geelong) — Has he ever had an opponent?
22. D. Merrett (Brisbane) — Comical, he is not a footballer and why has he always got dirt on his face?
23. A Monfries (Essendon) — Supposedly the next Simon Black.
24. A. Simpson (North Melbourne) — Open your eyes when you kick!
25. D. Wirrpanda (West Coast) — Is he still playing?
26. J. Lewis (Hawthorn) — Overrated player, underrated thug.
27. B. Stanton (Essendon) — Bit early to wear number five surely?
28. N. Eagleton (Western Bulldogs) — Number 1 cherry picker in the AFL.
29. A. Embley (West Coast) — Hidden behind Cousins, Kerr, Judd and Cox too long.
30. D. Headland (Fremantle) — Genuine hack.
31. St Kilda Football Club — Dal Santo, Riewoldt, Koschitzke, Hayes, Ball, Gram, Maguire and no premierships.
32. K Bartlett (SEN commentator) — Number one bitter man in the AFL, do not dare have a different opinion to him or prove him wrong, he thinks he walks on water, shame nobody likes him.
So we ended up with 32, including Walls and Bartlett who are not players, some would argue never were, but just had to be included.
I love vegatarian food. It goes great with steak.