Things that give you the sh1ts

[Booney]

Go to Perth they said. It'll be fun they said.

Nobody said I'd bring a head full of COVID back with me! What a shit night that was.

[MW]

Go to Perth they said. It'll be fun they said.

Nobody said I'd bring a head full of COVID back with me! What a shit night that was.

2nd time with the vid?

[Booney]

Nup, first. Other iso was under close contact rules.

Do not recommend. 0/10.

[Lightning McQueen]

Well there's a first time for everything and unfortunately I got caught out for something I never thought could happen to me.

I noticed my usual dump station had a "do not use" sign on it so I went to the other one, to my horror once I finished the transaction I discovered that it was out of paper.

The cleaner has copped an absolute bollocking on their sheet for them to peruse when they arrive this afternoon, they are industrial sized rolls that last weeks, when they're down under 10% they are meant to remove them from the dispenser and replace them leaving the butt roll to be used manually. Too bad if I was a visitor.

[heater31]

Well there's a first time for everything and unfortunately I got caught out for something I never thought could happen to me.

I noticed my usual dump station had a "do not use" sign on it so I went to the other one, to my horror once I finished the transaction I discovered that it was out of paper.

The cleaner has copped an absolute bollocking on their sheet for them to peruse when they arrive this afternoon, they are industrial sized rolls that last weeks, when they're down under 10% they are meant to remove them from the dispenser and replace them leaving the butt roll to be used manually. Too bad if I was a visitor.

That one time you don't check supply before getting down to business.....

[Lightning McQueen]

Well there's a first time for everything and unfortunately I got caught out for something I never thought could happen to me.

I noticed my usual dump station had a "do not use" sign on it so I went to the other one, to my horror once I finished the transaction I discovered that it was out of paper.

The cleaner has copped an absolute bollocking on their sheet for them to peruse when they arrive this afternoon, they are industrial sized rolls that last weeks, when they're down under 10% they are meant to remove them from the dispenser and replace them leaving the butt roll to be used manually. Too bad if I was a visitor.

That one time you don't check supply before getting down to business.....

I'm usually very anal.

I remember getting teased by my ex-wife the first time she came to my place as she thought I had an unusually high amount of back up rolls in my toilet along with a current 48 pack and a full one too, at all times. One week later her son got caught short and they needed an emergency trip to Coles for reinforcements, I was smiling like a chesire cat.

[RB]

I remember getting teased by my ex-wife the first time she came to my place as she thought I had an unusually high amount of back up rolls in my toilet along with a current 48 pack and a full one too, at all times.

You can never have too many.

[Booney]

Going to be a long week, I'm watching hot dog eating competitions on day 1.

[Jimmy_041]

Well there's a first time for everything and unfortunately I got caught out for something I never thought could happen to me.

I noticed my usual dump station had a "do not use" sign on it so I went to the other one, to my horror once I finished the transaction I discovered that it was out of paper.

The cleaner has copped an absolute bollocking on their sheet for them to peruse when they arrive this afternoon, they are industrial sized rolls that last weeks, when they're down under 10% they are meant to remove them from the dispenser and replace them leaving the butt roll to be used manually. Too bad if I was a visitor.

I got caught badly in a restaurant in Shanghai
I didn't have time to check (if you know what I mean)
Lucky I was wearing boxer shorts not my usual G banger

[Spargo]

Well there's a first time for everything and unfortunately I got caught out for something I never thought could happen to me.

I noticed my usual dump station had a "do not use" sign on it so I went to the other one, to my horror once I finished the transaction I discovered that it was out of paper.

The cleaner has copped an absolute bollocking on their sheet for them to peruse when they arrive this afternoon, they are industrial sized rolls that last weeks, when they're down under 10% they are meant to remove them from the dispenser and replace them leaving the butt roll to be used manually. Too bad if I was a visitor.

I got caught badly in a restaurant in Shanghai
I didn't have time to check (if you know what I mean)
Lucky I was wearing boxer shorts not my usual G banger

I learnt a long time ago to always carry a roll in your golf bag.

[Booney]

Well there's a first time for everything and unfortunately I got caught out for something I never thought could happen to me.

I noticed my usual dump station had a "do not use" sign on it so I went to the other one, to my horror once I finished the transaction I discovered that it was out of paper.

The cleaner has copped an absolute bollocking on their sheet for them to peruse when they arrive this afternoon, they are industrial sized rolls that last weeks, when they're down under 10% they are meant to remove them from the dispenser and replace them leaving the butt roll to be used manually. Too bad if I was a visitor.

I got caught badly in a restaurant in Shanghai
I didn't have time to check (if you know what I mean)
Lucky I was wearing boxer shorts not my usual G banger

I learnt a long time ago to always carry a roll in your golf bag.

Car boot, golf bag, boat.

[Pseudo]

A mate of mine was on a tour at a buddhist temple in Thailand when he got the urge. The toilet at the temple was a simple hole in the ground, no water, no paper. The only thing in the toilet besides the hole was a statue of the Buddha.



So he wiped his arse on that.

[Vamos]

Well there's a first time for everything and unfortunately I got caught out for something I never thought could happen to me.

I noticed my usual dump station had a "do not use" sign on it so I went to the other one, to my horror once I finished the transaction I discovered that it was out of paper.

The cleaner has copped an absolute bollocking on their sheet for them to peruse when they arrive this afternoon, they are industrial sized rolls that last weeks, when they're down under 10% they are meant to remove them from the dispenser and replace them leaving the butt roll to be used manually. Too bad if I was a visitor.

MbFYcBB.gif (496.56 KiB) Viewed 1491 times

[Spargo]

A mate of mine was on a tour at a buddhist temple in Thailand when he got the urge. The toilet at the temple was a simple hole in the ground, no water, no paper. The only thing in the toilet besides the hole was a statue of the Buddha.



So he wiped his arse on that.

I was sitting on a “long drop” one time doing the business & a bloke sat down next to me. Pulled down his strides & a 50 cent piece fell out of his pocket into the pit below. With that he pulled out his wallet, took out a $100 note & dropped it down.
“What the hell did you do that for?” I asked
“I wasn’t going down there just for 50 cents…” he replied

[DOC]

A mate of mine was on a tour at a buddhist temple in Thailand when he got the urge. The toilet at the temple was a simple hole in the ground, no water, no paper. The only thing in the toilet besides the hole was a statue of the Buddha.



So he wiped his arse on that.

Well Doctor, after I had a poo there was no paper so I was wiping the bot on a statue of Buddha and next thing it was right up there.

[Brodlach]

[Vamos]

A mate of mine was on a tour at a buddhist temple in Thailand when he got the urge. The toilet at the temple was a simple hole in the ground, no water, no paper. The only thing in the toilet besides the hole was a statue of the Buddha.



So he wiped his arse on that.

I had the urge at Coles one evening, had to leave a full trolley half way down the aisle and race to the dunny in the precinct. Got to the Mens and it was locked, panic set in, then I seen a beam of light coming from the disabled toilet, thankfully it was open and unoccupied. Went home after that

[Lightning McQueen]

A mate of mine was on a tour at a buddhist temple in Thailand when he got the urge. The toilet at the temple was a simple hole in the ground, no water, no paper. The only thing in the toilet besides the hole was a statue of the Buddha.



So he wiped his arse on that.

I was sitting on a “long drop” one time doing the business & a bloke sat down next to me. Pulled down his strides & a 50 cent piece fell out of his pocket into the pit below. With that he pulled out his wallet, took out a $100 note & dropped it down.
“What the hell did you do that for?” I asked
“I wasn’t going down there just for 50 cents…” he replied

[Lightning McQueen]

A few years back the son and I were at the Odeon cinema in Semaphore when we were both hanging for a wee for the last half an hour of the movie.

As soon as the movie finished we ran downstairs and straight across to the adjacent toilet, I was a bit bewildered that there was no piss trough but considering the age of the building and how desperate I was I just went about my business.

As we made our way to the exit door it clicked as there was a flurry of women and girls walking in, we opened the door and there was my daughter pretty much crying with laughter. We were meant to stick around for a feed and a trip to the beach after that but I just didn't want to be seen anywhere near Semaphore from then on.

[whufc]

A few years back the son and I were at the Odeon cinema in Semaphore when we were both hanging for a wee for the last half an hour of the movie.

As soon as the movie finished we ran downstairs and straight across to the adjacent toilet, I was a bit bewildered that there was no piss trough but considering the age of the building and how desperate I was I just went about my business.

As we made our way to the exit door it clicked as there was a flurry of women and girls walking in, we opened the door and there was my daughter pretty much crying with laughter. We were meant to stick around for a feed and a trip to the beach after that but I just didn't want to be seen anywhere near Semaphore from then on.

Yeah had similar when I was a teenager at a shopping centre. Went to take a dump and heard a couple of ladies walk in chatting away. Chuckled to myself thinking they had come into the wrong toilets

Next minute another mother and child came in talking away.....at that moment I realised the joke was on me.

Matters got worse though when I heard the mum say to the child that they needed to wait out the front of this one because they were all full..... At that point I became panic stricken. I waited for what felt like ten minutes hoping another cubicle would become free and the noise would die off so I could sneak out. That didn't happen.

I was left with no choice but to walk out the cubicle infront of the mum and child and another lady washing her hands. I didn't say a word....just walked straight out, straight to my car and straight home.