Things that give you the sh1ts

[Pseudo]

People that say 'yous'

should be executed on the spot

A bloke in our Melbourne offices puts "youse" in emails.

So he youses it often?

[tipper]

our second flat tyre in a month. its been years since ive had one, but now, two different cars have had them in a short space of time..... both due to **** letting stuff fall on the road that shouldnt be there. in my cars case, it was a pair of side cutters, straight through the tread handle first, and the tyre couldnt be saved. at least this time its only a nail and should be repairable but seriously, how hard is it for presumably tradies to ******* put stuff away before they drive off??

[locky801]

having my onions on the bottom of my snag sandwich, just wasnt the same

[daysofourlives]

having my onions on the bottom of my snag sandwich, just wasnt the same

At least youre still here to tell the story

[Armchair expert]

Volkswagen drivers, if a f******* if hooning around a residential area you can basically guarantee its a F****** in a Volkswagen

[Lightning McQueen]

Volkswagen drivers, if a f******* if hooning around a residential area you can basically guarantee its a F****** in a Volkswagen

If you live in Düsseldorf.

[Booney]

Volkswagen drivers, if a f******* if hooning around a residential area you can basically guarantee its a F****** in a Volkswagen

[Armchair expert]

Volkswagen drivers, if a f******* if hooning around a residential area you can basically guarantee its a F****** in a Volkswagen

If you live in Düsseldorf.

Or Torrensville

[HH3]

Volkswagen drivers, if a f******* if hooning around a residential area you can basically guarantee its a F****** in a Volkswagen

I 100% agree. I've got two VW Golf drivers on my street who are both absolute f**kwits. One nearly clipped me, then pulled into a house a few doors down.

You must have to flat foot them to get going.

[HH3]

Roll up, walk in the door, phones already ringing, no ones picking it up, HH3 picks up, its a complete tosser, tosser swears at HH3, HH3 tells drivers to take their time with this "urgent" delivery....

Happy Friday.

[Spargo]

Roll up, walk in the door, phones already ringing, no ones picking it up, HH3 picks up, its a complete tosser, tosser swears at HH3, HH3 tells drivers to take their time with this "urgent" delivery....

Happy Friday.

I can cheer you up. My Red Sox 2018 Champions hat & t shirt have arrived.

[HH3]

Roll up, walk in the door, phones already ringing, no ones picking it up, HH3 picks up, its a complete tosser, tosser swears at HH3, HH3 tells drivers to take their time with this "urgent" delivery....

Happy Friday.

I can cheer you up. My Red Sox 2018 Champions hat & t shirt have arrived.

Im happy for you. The best team won. At least Machado didnt win.

[Booney]

Roll up, walk in the door, phones already ringing, no ones picking it up, HH3 picks up, its a complete tosser, tosser swears at HH3, HH3 tells drivers to take their time with this "urgent" delivery....

Happy Friday.

I can cheer you up. I rolled in late after lawn bowls last night, boss had a bacon and egg sandwich on my desk and tells me he's going around 10:30 and won't be back.

[Lightning McQueen]

Volkswagen drivers, if a f******* if hooning around a residential area you can basically guarantee its a F****** in a Volkswagen

I 100% agree. I've got two VW Golf drivers on my street who are both absolute f**kwits. One nearly clipped me, then pulled into a house a few doors down.

You must have to flat foot them to get going.

My brother had a VW Golf when he was about 20, he reckons it was the zippiest thing he's ever had, there was a bit of a maze of a laneway in Prospect back in the day and he'd absolutely hoot through there for a laugh at everyone's expense, it was scary AF.

[The Ash Man]

Roll up, walk in the door, phones already ringing, no ones picking it up, HH3 picks up, its a complete tosser, tosser swears at HH3, HH3 tells drivers to take their time with this "urgent" delivery....

Happy Friday.

I can cheer you up. I rolled in late after lawn bowls last night, boss had a bacon and egg sandwich on my desk and tells me he's going around 10:30 and won't be back.

I can also cheer you up. I just got up after a fair few froffs last night. Heading into town for “brunch” and then going to wander down to Adelaide Oval and watch some cricket with some beers.


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[Booney]

Volkswagen drivers, if a f******* if hooning around a residential area you can basically guarantee its a F****** in a Volkswagen

I 100% agree. I've got two VW Golf drivers on my street who are both absolute f**kwits. One nearly clipped me, then pulled into a house a few doors down.

You must have to flat foot them to get going.

My brother had a VW Golf when he was about 20, he reckons it was the zippiest thing he's ever had, there was a bit of a maze of a laneway in Prospect back in the day and he'd absolutely hoot through there for a laugh at everyone's expense, it was scary AF.

My boss has a 2 year old Golf R, it's a scream to get around in. Like a train on tracks.

[Footy Chick]

Roll up, walk in the door, phones already ringing, no ones picking it up, HH3 picks up, its a complete tosser, tosser swears at HH3, HH3 tells drivers to take their time with this "urgent" delivery....

Happy Friday.

I can cheer you up. I rolled in late after lawn bowls last night, boss had a bacon and egg sandwich on my desk and tells me he's going around 10:30 and won't be back.

I can also cheer you up. I just got up after a fair few froffs last night. Heading into town for “brunch” and then going to wander down to Adelaide Oval and watch some cricket with some beers.


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I'll await your mandatory FB post

[HH3]

Roll up, walk in the door, phones already ringing, no ones picking it up, HH3 picks up, its a complete tosser, tosser swears at HH3, HH3 tells drivers to take their time with this "urgent" delivery....

Happy Friday.

I can cheer you up. I rolled in late after lawn bowls last night, boss had a bacon and egg sandwich on my desk and tells me he's going around 10:30 and won't be back.

I can also cheer you up. I just got up after a fair few froffs last night. Heading into town for “brunch” and then going to wander down to Adelaide Oval and watch some cricket with some beers.


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Go f**k yourselves...

[Kahuna]

People who are so selfish or disorganized or time poor or important or lazy or arrogant that they can't keep their rubbish in the car until they get home.
Just had a jerk eject the remains of his Happy Meal onto my driveway. I cleaned it up for you f**khead.

[The Ash Man]

Roll up, walk in the door, phones already ringing, no ones picking it up, HH3 picks up, its a complete tosser, tosser swears at HH3, HH3 tells drivers to take their time with this "urgent" delivery....

Happy Friday.

I can cheer you up. I rolled in late after lawn bowls last night, boss had a bacon and egg sandwich on my desk and tells me he's going around 10:30 and won't be back.

I can also cheer you up. I just got up after a fair few froffs last night. Heading into town for “brunch” and then going to wander down to Adelaide Oval and watch some cricket with some beers.


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I'll await your mandatory FB post

Na not today. I was incognito.


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