Things that make you sad.

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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Failed Creation » Mon May 05, 2014 10:14 am

BoundaryRider84 wrote:
Failed Creation wrote:Realizing that my best mate died six years ago today.

****, I miss him...


Sorry to hear mate. Keep your head up mate, I'm sure he is looking down on you.


Cheers, mate.

I'm trying my best today, as I do every day, but time doesn't make it any easier. I know he'd be disappointed that I'm sulking about it. I just can't help it.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Booney » Mon May 05, 2014 10:45 am

Q. wrote:
fisho mcspaz wrote:When someone is destroying themself in front of you and there's not a damn thing you can do to stop it happening. And you cop it if you try. I've had issues with drinking and depression and all sorts of s*** but I don't know how to deal with someone who's an alcoholic.


Been trying to get brother-in-law to rehab for years. It's difficult when they just don't want to.


Been dealing with a work colleague/mate in recent months who lost his marriage through his alcohol abuse. Family interstate have proven to be no chop and I'm the only one who cares enough to help. Any mates he had here have deserted him long ago.

Had another rough weekend while trying to help him move his stuff out of his house to hand the keys over to his ex.....got there yesterday to someone not capable of standing and talking let alone palletizing belongings for interstate transport.

Easier to give up on him, but that's what he want's....so I wont. Bloody tough though.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Failed Creation » Mon May 05, 2014 10:50 am

Booney wrote:
Q. wrote:
fisho mcspaz wrote:When someone is destroying themself in front of you and there's not a damn thing you can do to stop it happening. And you cop it if you try. I've had issues with drinking and depression and all sorts of s*** but I don't know how to deal with someone who's an alcoholic.


Been trying to get brother-in-law to rehab for years. It's difficult when they just don't want to.


Been dealing with a work colleague/mate in recent months who lost his marriage through his alcohol abuse. Family interstate have proven to be no chop and I'm the only one who cares enough to help. Any mates he had here have deserted him long ago.

Had another rough weekend while trying to help him move his stuff out of his house to hand the keys over to his ex.....got there yesterday to someone not capable of standing and talking let alone palletizing belongings for interstate transport.

Easier to give up on him, but that's what he want's....so I wont. Bloody tough though.


If and when he starts to recover, he'll remember that you were there for him when everyone else abandoned him.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Booney » Mon May 05, 2014 10:59 am

Failed Creation wrote:
Booney wrote:
Q. wrote:
fisho mcspaz wrote:When someone is destroying themself in front of you and there's not a damn thing you can do to stop it happening. And you cop it if you try. I've had issues with drinking and depression and all sorts of s*** but I don't know how to deal with someone who's an alcoholic.


Been trying to get brother-in-law to rehab for years. It's difficult when they just don't want to.


Been dealing with a work colleague/mate in recent months who lost his marriage through his alcohol abuse. Family interstate have proven to be no chop and I'm the only one who cares enough to help. Any mates he had here have deserted him long ago.

Had another rough weekend while trying to help him move his stuff out of his house to hand the keys over to his ex.....got there yesterday to someone not capable of standing and talking let alone palletizing belongings for interstate transport.

Easier to give up on him, but that's what he want's....so I wont. Bloody tough though.


If and when he starts to recover, he'll remember that you were there for him when everyone else abandoned him.


He knows that now and he knows he let me down yesterday, but then that gives him reason to write himself off again and so the circle starts once more.

Feels bad > drinks > sobers up > feels bad > drinks....

I'm a pretty straight shooter and he knows where I stand. Sometimes its tough love other times it's a good cook up to sober him up. I feel like he's getting closer to helping himself. After several visits to mental health units around Adelaide there sure as hell isn't any help coming from those over-worked under-resourced departments. What a sad indictment they are on government spending/funding.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Failed Creation » Mon May 05, 2014 11:19 am

Booney wrote:He knows that now and he knows he let me down yesterday, but then that gives him reason to write himself off again and so the circle starts once more.

Feels bad > drinks > sobers up > feels bad > drinks....

I'm a pretty straight shooter and he knows where I stand. Sometimes its tough love other times it's a good cook up to sober him up. I feel like he's getting closer to helping himself. After several visits to mental health units around Adelaide there sure as hell isn't any help coming from those over-worked under-resourced departments. What a sad indictment they are on government spending/funding.


Exactly, I know that first-hand. It's not the fault of those who work in the industry that they're spread so thin, but I really do feel for those who slip through the cracks. I was lucky that I eventually got to a stage where I could function on a day-to-day basis.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Booney » Mon May 05, 2014 11:20 am

Failed Creation wrote:
Booney wrote:He knows that now and he knows he let me down yesterday, but then that gives him reason to write himself off again and so the circle starts once more.

Feels bad > drinks > sobers up > feels bad > drinks....

I'm a pretty straight shooter and he knows where I stand. Sometimes its tough love other times it's a good cook up to sober him up. I feel like he's getting closer to helping himself. After several visits to mental health units around Adelaide there sure as hell isn't any help coming from those over-worked under-resourced departments. What a sad indictment they are on government spending/funding.


Exactly, I know that first-hand. It's not the fault of those who work in the industry that they're spread so thin, but I really do feel for those who slip through the cracks. I was lucky that I eventually got to a stage where I could function on a day-to-day basis.


Good for you mate and keep it up.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Failed Creation » Mon May 05, 2014 11:25 am

Booney wrote:
Failed Creation wrote:
Booney wrote:He knows that now and he knows he let me down yesterday, but then that gives him reason to write himself off again and so the circle starts once more.

Feels bad > drinks > sobers up > feels bad > drinks....

I'm a pretty straight shooter and he knows where I stand. Sometimes its tough love other times it's a good cook up to sober him up. I feel like he's getting closer to helping himself. After several visits to mental health units around Adelaide there sure as hell isn't any help coming from those over-worked under-resourced departments. What a sad indictment they are on government spending/funding.


Exactly, I know that first-hand. It's not the fault of those who work in the industry that they're spread so thin, but I really do feel for those who slip through the cracks. I was lucky that I eventually got to a stage where I could function on a day-to-day basis.


Good for you mate and keep it up.


Likewise, mate.

It's through the support of people like yourself that some people can eventually conquer the demons of mental illness, drug and/or alcohol abuse.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Psyber » Mon May 05, 2014 6:49 pm

Booney wrote: He knows that now and he knows he let me down yesterday, but then that gives him reason to write himself off again and so the circle starts once more.

Feels bad > drinks > sobers up > feels bad > drinks....

I'm a pretty straight shooter and he knows where I stand. Sometimes its tough love other times it's a good cook up to sober him up. I feel like he's getting closer to helping himself. After several visits to mental health units around Adelaide there sure as hell isn't any help coming from those over-worked under-resourced departments. What a sad indictment they are on government spending/funding.

Very true. Most clinics in both SA and Victoria offer something like a 5 to7 day inpatient "dry out" and then discharge to outpatient follow up.

But everybody in Medicine knows that while acute withdrawal occurs in those 5 to 7 days, secondary withdrawal (which tends to occur in the more serious drinkers) tends to show up around days 10 to 14, and that is also when the DTs are more likely to occur .
Net result: people get to about day 11 and then feel terrible and cave in.

But the "revolving door" approach makes the statistics look better to the hospital bureaucrats and those in the government health departments.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby fisho mcspaz » Mon May 05, 2014 9:31 pm

I had a housemate who went to Joslin for alcoholism. Every day he was falling-down drunk. He was a chef and a restaurant franchise owner and he lost the lot. Joslin did nothing for him - he just took speed instead and then came out and got straight back on the piss after a week. We sent him to his parents in the end and I don't know where he is now.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby woodublieve12 » Wed May 07, 2014 9:28 am

I was going to put this in the wrestling forum, but thought more people needed to see it... Don't need to be wrestling fan to appreciate this. Very sad

"Fellas, it’s OK to be in pain. It’s OK to hurt. It’s OK to be sad. It’s no longer OK to suffer in silence."
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby carey » Wed May 07, 2014 7:32 pm

The direction the AFL is taken the greatest game in the world makes me very sad.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Phantom Gossiper » Thu May 08, 2014 9:39 am

woodublieve12 wrote:I was going to put this in the wrestling forum, but thought more people needed to see it... Don't need to be wrestling fan to appreciate this. Very sad

So sad.. made me tear up :(
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Footy Chick » Thu May 15, 2014 6:43 pm

I just had Fat Cat returned to me from the animal cremation place in his urn.

2 weeks on and it's no easier.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Failed Creation » Thu May 15, 2014 11:39 pm

Footy Chick wrote:I just had Fat Cat returned to me from the animal cremation place in his urn.

2 weeks on and it's no easier.


My thoughts are with you, FC.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Hazbeen » Sun May 18, 2014 3:28 am

My 10 year old son getting bullied by the "cool kids" because he can think for himself and doesn't blindly follow what they want everyone to do. Didn't want to go to a birthday sleepover tonight because of the fear of being ostracised by the birthday boy who is his friend one day and his tormentor the next depending on who else is around.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Failed Creation » Sun May 18, 2014 12:37 pm

Hazbeen wrote:My 10 year old son getting bullied by the "cool kids" because he can think for himself and doesn't blindly follow what they want everyone to do. Didn't want to go to a birthday sleepover tonight because of the fear of being ostracised by the birthday boy who is his friend one day and his tormentor the next depending on who else is around.


Unfortunately, in this day and age, there's no clear-cut way to stop it, is there?

When I was a kid, my grandfather told me that the best way to beat a group of bullies is to single out the ringleader and belt the suitcase out of him. I tried it on some Year 10s once, it worked, and Year 8 was the last time I got bullied. In fact, most people left me alone after that.

However, there's no such thing as a 1-on-1 fistfight anymore. These cowards (even at 10 years old) hunt in packs, and as they get older, they start to use weapons.

I really do wish I could help you out, mate. If only there was a definitive answer.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Q. » Sun May 18, 2014 7:07 pm

At Smithfield for footy yesterday, bloke gives his 8-year old daughter his can of Jack Daniels to drink and says "don't tell mum".

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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Failed Creation » Sun May 18, 2014 8:28 pm

Q. wrote:At Smithfield for footy yesterday, bloke gives his 8-year old daughter his can of Jack Daniels to drink and says "don't tell mum".

Image


That's ******* awful.

I can't even stand it when parents let their kids hold empty alcohol bottles or cans. Some of my friends even take photos of this shit.

Sadly, it's not just a 'Smithfield' thing either; it happens everywhere.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby fisho mcspaz » Sun May 18, 2014 10:58 pm

Hazbeen wrote:My 10 year old son getting bullied by the "cool kids" because he can think for himself and doesn't blindly follow what they want everyone to do. Didn't want to go to a birthday sleepover tonight because of the fear of being ostracised by the birthday boy who is his friend one day and his tormentor the next depending on who else is around.


Ohhhhh I'm so sorry mate. I really am. My nine-year-old has always had trouble with some of the kids in his class, one day they're his friends and the next day they're picking on him and he doesn't know what to do. He's an introverted kid - nearly all his teachers have mentioned Asperger's to me at some point (he hasn't got Asperger's), and honestly he reminds me of myself at the same age. I was just like him. I liked to read more than anything and often shut the other kids out and got picked on for it. Things are getting better for my boy, he's got several good friends now, but some of those kids I just wanted to murder. Didn't help that their mothers disliked me as well (they're all 40-somethings who wear three-quarter-length pants and drive Subaru Big Bastards or whatever they're called. A friend dubbed them the Miller's Movement (Miller's Fashion Club).) I wish I knew what to tell you. Every kid is different. We've managed to help our boy with his friendships and in-class life in general - things have improved a lot this year - but it's taken a few years to get to this point, and it depends on the teacher too. And as a parent I still make mistakes - Angus was telling me the things one kid had said to him and I said 'Don't worry about that little arsehole, he's just trying to make you react.' Angus was like 'Yeah!' and I had to tell him please don't repeat that. :?
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby fisho mcspaz » Sun May 18, 2014 11:27 pm

Failed Creation wrote:
Booney wrote:
Failed Creation wrote:
Booney wrote:He knows that now and he knows he let me down yesterday, but then that gives him reason to write himself off again and so the circle starts once more.

Feels bad > drinks > sobers up > feels bad > drinks....

I'm a pretty straight shooter and he knows where I stand. Sometimes its tough love other times it's a good cook up to sober him up. I feel like he's getting closer to helping himself. After several visits to mental health units around Adelaide there sure as hell isn't any help coming from those over-worked under-resourced departments. What a sad indictment they are on government spending/funding.


Exactly, I know that first-hand. It's not the fault of those who work in the industry that they're spread so thin, but I really do feel for those who slip through the cracks. I was lucky that I eventually got to a stage where I could function on a day-to-day basis.


Good for you mate and keep it up.


Likewise, mate.

It's through the support of people like yourself that some people can eventually conquer the demons of mental illness, drug and/or alcohol abuse.


I can't do it any more. I know I'm gutless but I just can't. The kids, they see what goes on. It is going to be bloody hard because I have very little support, and his family sweep these problems under the rug or tell me that I'm running away from MY problems. All I know is my kids shouldn't have to hear some of the names I get called and they shouldn't have to see me crying half the bloody week. 8 years and I couldn't do a damn thing to change this path of destructive behaviour. We might be OK for a few months or a few years, but always the eventual relapse. I'm done.
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