SA Footy

whufc wrote:Miss 12 going on 21 has changed her attitude completely .

The Bedge wrote:
Jnr Bedge is 4 and he's going through a bit of a feral stage where he likes to push buttons and test the limits (does it incredibly well),

whufc wrote:We are at that akward stage with a 12 & 10 year old.

They have grown up to be inseparable especially being the glue of a spit family. Recently though miss 12 has become a lady and also started high school meaning they no longer at the same school.

Miss 12 going on 21 has changed her attitude completely and has developed a strong friendship group that doesn't include miss 10.Sadly Miss 10 is one of the sweetest, kind hearted kids you will ever meet and is really struggling to understand why the sistership isn't as close as it once was. Both myself and the mum have tried to explain but not sure she really gets it...…..almost a real life 'Frozen' scenario. Also spoken to miss 12 about how miss 10 is feeling but yeah that's going down like a led balloon.

The Bedge wrote:

Lightning McQueen wrote:The evolution of sibling rivalry.

It's not much but it's great to see when your kids are old enough to appreciate each other for who they are and want to help each other voluntarily not the good ole "Do it yourself".

Last night my lads training went for an hour longer than it was meant to, I was cooking a surf'n'turf for him and my daughter, she tells me that I may as well get dinner started and she'll go pick him up.

They get home and he pours them both a drink without even asking if she wants one, he puts salt and pepper on her steamed vegies because he knows that's what she'd want.

After dinner she grabs both of their plates and rinses them off after she forfeited the last bit of her steak and a couple of prawns to go with and then grabs him a magnum out of the freezer while she grabs herself a cherry ripe ice cream.

It's f*** all but it's bloody nice after intervening for many years over petty little whinges at each other and nit-picking, it takes me back to when my brother and I finally got a long, he was an absolute c*** to me for my entire childhood until I had enough and flipped out one day..............at a bowling club on a family day mind you

So you're telling me there's hope!

The Bedge wrote:

whufc wrote:Miss 12 going on 21 has changed her attitude completely .

Our two girls are 10 and think they're adults.. the eldest is 18 so that prob doesn't help coz they try to be like her.. and they straight out irritate me.

Found myself cringing a lot and thinking back to those girls in primary school / early high school that I absolutely loathed because of the way they talked/acted.. it's exactly what our girls are like now.. Real stuck up/bitchy like

Jnr Bedge is 4 and he's going through a bit of a feral stage where he likes to push buttons and test the limits (does it incredibly well), and all you hear is the girls constantly screaming at him like banshees coz he's annoying the life out of them.

I cant wait for the quieter days to return

Lightning McQueen wrote:

amber_fluid wrote:

Good stuff mate.
You’ve mastered this parenting thing.
Can you come to my joint and sort out my son and daughter as well?

Ha, I don't know that we ever master parenting, I don't argue with my kids or people in general at all, I point out the difference in opinions and move on.

It used to shit me to tears hearing the kids argue, I'd move one to other end of the house and they weren't allowed to cross the border unless they were doing something nice for other one.

I still get the odd phone call or text where one is upset about the other, I just tell them because they are so close that the smallest issues hurt a bit more, I don't take sides or tell the other one off, I simply listen without prejudice.

What are the ages of your kids?

Lightning McQueen wrote:2: Now he's a little older and the girls are that bit older too he has lost his cuteness to them, I'm sure they dote on him at times when it suits them but could pretend he's not there at the drop of a hat too, the lad just wants to be a part of something and he's probably gone from being the centre of attention to just being part of the team. .

amber_fluid wrote:

Lightning McQueen wrote:

amber_fluid wrote:

Good stuff mate.
You’ve mastered this parenting thing.
Can you come to my joint and sort out my son and daughter as well?

Ha, I don't know that we ever master parenting, I don't argue with my kids or people in general at all, I point out the difference in opinions and move on.

It used to shit me to tears hearing the kids argue, I'd move one to other end of the house and they weren't allowed to cross the border unless they were doing something nice for other one.

I still get the odd phone call or text where one is upset about the other, I just tell them because they are so close that the smallest issues hurt a bit more, I don't take sides or tell the other one off, I simply listen without prejudice.

What are the ages of your kids?

Daughter is 13 and son is 10.
I’m like you as I tend not to argue and definitely pick my battles here.

Lightning McQueen wrote:

whufc wrote:We are at that akward stage with a 12 & 10 year old.

They have grown up to be inseparable especially being the glue of a spit family. Recently though miss 12 has become a lady and also started high school meaning they no longer at the same school.

Miss 12 going on 21 has changed her attitude completely and has developed a strong friendship group that doesn't include miss 10.Sadly Miss 10 is one of the sweetest, kind hearted kids you will ever meet and is really struggling to understand why the sistership isn't as close as it once was. Both myself and the mum have tried to explain but not sure she really gets it...…..almost a real life 'Frozen' scenario. Also spoken to miss 12 about how miss 10 is feeling but yeah that's going down like a led balloon.

Not much you can do there besides do more one on one things that Miss 10 would appreciate, Miss 12 will be wanting sleepovers and shopping trips with friends as she develops her own independence on social status, the gap will close when they are 14 & 16 and chat on a more equal level as they start sharing clothes, your girls although are only 2 years apart in age they are probably closer to 5 or 6 years apart in mind, it will be like a piece of elastic that will eventually recluse back to almost nothing.

There's no right or wrong solution, let your girls develop their own personalities and take the opportunity have that alone time with the other when it arises.

My kids tell me everything, even when they know I'm not going to like it, I can't help them if they aren't honest and they're aware of that.

whufc wrote:
Yeah that's our plan.

Just heartbreaking seeing your daughters world change especially for reasons she is currently to young to understand fully.

Hopefully over the next few months we can convince miss 12 to be a little more considerate and at least take a little bit of time to talk and hang with miss 10. At the moment that is pretty much non existent miss 12 wants to be online with her friends 100% of the time. The tantrums when she cant be a horrendous, the old FOMO kicks in because all her other friends are doing it.

DOC wrote:That's not only great advice LM but I gather a true reflection of you.

DOC wrote:That's not only great advice LM but I gather a true reflection of you.

Lightning McQueen wrote:

whufc wrote:
Yeah that's our plan.

Just heartbreaking seeing your daughters world change especially for reasons she is currently to young to understand fully.

Hopefully over the next few months we can convince miss 12 to be a little more considerate and at least take a little bit of time to talk and hang with miss 10. At the moment that is pretty much non existent miss 12 wants to be online with her friends 100% of the time. The tantrums when she cant be a horrendous, the old FOMO kicks in because all her other friends are doing it.

Don't bet on it, do cool stuff with Miss 10 and then Miss 12 will see she's missing out.

Not everything comes with a price tag either, even just playing Mario Carts together always brought the 3 of us together, we could all beat each other on certain tracks and it was "winner stays on" but we had to go through the worlds and select the next track in line.

It helped that they were both sporty so going down the nets for a couple of hours was cool and we had access to a bowling machine, we journeyed into the city every now and then just to look around or visit the museum or rode our bikes to Henley.

amber_fluid wrote:

DOC wrote:That's not only great advice LM but I gather a true reflection of you.

He’s a big kid?

whufc wrote:
yeah that will be the plan.

TBH just being out with the entire day for morning to dusk whilst she does her horse stuff will make her the happiest kid on earth.

amber_fluid wrote:

Lightning McQueen wrote:

amber_fluid wrote:

Good stuff mate.
You’ve mastered this parenting thing.
Can you come to my joint and sort out my son and daughter as well?

Ha, I don't know that we ever master parenting, I don't argue with my kids or people in general at all, I point out the difference in opinions and move on.

It used to shit me to tears hearing the kids argue, I'd move one to other end of the house and they weren't allowed to cross the border unless they were doing something nice for other one.

I still get the odd phone call or text where one is upset about the other, I just tell them because they are so close that the smallest issues hurt a bit more, I don't take sides or tell the other one off, I simply listen without prejudice.

What are the ages of your kids?

Daughter is 13 and son is 10.
I’m like you as I tend not to argue and definitely pick my battles here.

cracka wrote:My daughter is 22, we often clash on issues & both being pigheaded sometimes it doesn't end well. I am learning to let things go a bit better now so we don't have as many arguments. When she was about 3 she had a discussion/argument with the next door neighbour about what I can't remember. At the end of it he was laughing at her & said "gee I pity the man that ends up marrying you" quick as a flash she snapped straight back "well I pity the man that ends up marrying you"
My 20 year old son is as laid back as they come.

Lightning McQueen wrote:The evolution of sibling rivalry.

It's not much but it's great to see when your kids are old enough to appreciate each other for who they are and want to help each other voluntarily not the good ole "Do it yourself".

Last night my lads training went for an hour longer than it was meant to, I was cooking a surf'n'turf for him and my daughter, she tells me that I may as well get dinner started and she'll go pick him up.

They get home and he pours them both a drink without even asking if she wants one, he puts salt and pepper on her steamed vegies because he knows that's what she'd want.

After dinner she grabs both of their plates and rinses them off after she forfeited the last bit of her steak and a couple of prawns to go with and then grabs him a magnum out of the freezer while she grabs herself a cherry ripe ice cream.

It's f*** all but it's bloody nice after intervening for many years over petty little whinges at each other and nit-picking, it takes me back to when my brother and I finally got a long, he was an absolute c*** to me for my entire childhood until I had enough and flipped out one day..............at a bowling club on a family day mind you