What's in a name? - Women

[Rik E Boy]

What’s in a name…women. From an email I received today.

Ada blue haired, smells of wee.
Aimee Likes to strut her stuff, though theres not much 2 do so. Likes to play with cheese.
Aimz Like italian breakfast bread rolls. hollow on the inside. would die to screw a lamar.
Aisha laughs like a hyena, fantastic in bed. likes tic
Alexandra Smart kick ass chic.
Alison bra and pants are the same garment, looks better with the light off.
Amanda IQ tends to be smaller than bra size. Probably a good shag though.
Amberley queen of ice, no friends with a nasty mean streak. More than likely a lesbian but
nice teeth
Amy devious, likes being on top, never stays the night
Aimz limited intelligence.
Andrea small breasts, drinks pints.
Angela Vain, hairstyle more important than oxygen. Hangs around toilets.
Anna has eyes bigger than her stomach. but her waistline shows it.
Annabelle doesn't wear knickers.
Annette she's BIG.
Anne looks like a horse, can't drive.
Anouska shags like a rabbit, not fussy about appearance.
Beatie she would rather jump out of a plane with out a parashoot than having to pick up a
spider.
Belinda pleasing on the eye, usually has a couple of good points.
Beryl repressed alcoholic.
Betty makes simple tasks seem like brain surgery.
Beverley trapped in an eighties timewarp.
Bianca ginger.
Bridgette eats pizzas all day, smokes cigars.
Britney falsely improved, no use to society.
Camilla replaces the word 'yes' with 'ya'.
Carina looks like the back of a bus, doesn't swallow.
Carol into everything you've only ever read about. Coin
Caroline into threesomes. Likes doggy style. Always up for it.
Carly the sexiest bitch in the world!!!!!!
Carli pretty but more mouth and flirting than action in the bedroom.
Casey painful lay, naïve but with a sense of humour, possibly once a man
Catherine attracted to the older man, needs ironing.
Claire perfect in every way and a complete sex goddess.
Celine emits hideous noises, waste of DNA.
Charlotte enjoys tea and cake, can sing the national anthem.
Cheryl can fit hand in mouth, eats glass. Has many ways with the boys
Christina hasn't got much of a life due to being a boring person. likes cammels.
Christine likes men in uniform, never warm.
Claudia highly annoying. finds it hard to keep friends.
Daisy virgin.
Danni should make nice threesome with sibling.
Davina drug induced mental damage, should shave her neck.
Dawn gets up early, smells of chips.
Deborah bites the pillow, uses both hands.
DeeDee cannot understand why no one else masturbates in Ikea.
Denise sits on cat's eyes, wears too much make up.
Diane enjoys company of animals. Deep as a puddle. Adds nothing to society.
Donna 70's throw back, likes cabbage.
Doris purple haired, stinks of wee.
Elaine rides sidesaddle, drinks meths.
Eleanor centre of attention when she walks into a room,not always for the good. has the gift of gab.
Elizabeth born to perform, hates chickens.
Ellie far too attractive for the swear words that come out of her mouth.
Emily wears odd socks but that doesn't mean shes not cute!
Emma gullible and easily swayed by a good looker!
Estelle likes wombles, eats grass.
Esther plump with sagging breasts, normally heavily tattooed.
Faith legs meet at knees, can't shag standing up.
Faye wears wellies, can't swim.
Felicity she'll stab you with her nipples, plays darts
Fiona female mud wrestler, gives head.
Frances gives oral for a one pence peice. but loves to sow.
Frankie would make it as a farmer. people say she needs to shower more.
Gail farts a lot, drinks Guinness.
Gayleen big tall woman who talks 'bleep' all day.
Gaynor lesbian.
Gem like an arm chair. comfotable, loved, odd.
Gemma practically perfect in everyway. Loved by everyone. Good listener and friend.
Geraldine too posh for her own good, likes flying.
Gillian dyes her hair green, likes clubbing.
Gina eternal mother, eats nappies.
Glenda eats children, hates smoking.
Georgina wants to be a man.
Grace blubs a lot, wees in the bath.
Hannah needs to be naked at all times, eats kebabs.
Harriet has a brain somewhere, will prob end up living on pizza.
Hayley lives on dads beers, is lazy bitch.
Heather shags like a freight train, a screamer.
Helen loves sleeping and alcohol and is work shy.
Heidi the hills are alive with the sound of music, likes gherkins.
Hilary frigid bitch. Thinks money grows on trees.
Holly prickly to the touch, seasonal shagmeister.
Ina drinks tequila from the bottle, wets the bed.
Ingrid right wing Nazi tendencies, never smiles.
Jackie heroin addict, sold her child.
Janet soft, warm and really cuddly. Good shag.
Jane enjoys wanking men (or women).
Jasmine smells of sewers, eats the heads off rats.
Jemma does anal, wears too much eye make
Jennifer huge breasts, should shave her legs more often.
Jerrica a bitch thinks she's good
Jessica virgin, always will be.
Joanne moans in her sleep, cant cook, moans when she wakes up!
Jodie absolutely perfect in every way, every group of friends should have one!
Joy would make a good exotic dancer. men love her.
Judith big eyes, big tits.
Judy huge tits, married to an arse.
Julia innocent face, don't trust her, she'll steal your wallet in five minutes.
Justine massive tits, likes hanging around men's toilets.
Julie jabba the Hutt's sister, constantly pregnant.
Karen too smart for her own good and is insensitive to others.
Katie big feet, shags men over 50.
Kate talks complete bollocks all the time, scavenger.
Katherine is a follower. doomed to be successful but not compleatly happy.would fight for a
tea cosy.
Kelly smells of cheese, slobbers when kissing.
Kerry perfect in every way and a complete sex goddess.
Kimberley wants to be a bloke, drinks like a bloke, farts like a bloke and wears a wig.
Kirsty eats live moles, can't dance.
Kylie can't sing but who cares.
Lana hated by her parents, accidental pregnancy.
Lara action packed, never seen naked.
Laura likes Max power magazine, can't drive.
Lauren pert breasts, seldom ventures out at night.
Leah likes outdoor sex, wees standing up.
Lena eats food then throws up, rapidly shrinking.
Leslie likes bondage, hates men.
Linda perfect in every way
Lindsay likes doggy style, doesn't do housework.
Lisa will take all your money and run, gets turned on by porn.
Livvy pink, prim and perfect. people find this annoying.
Liz good looking, definately one to shag.
Lorraine constantly whinges, will strip for a packet of jellybabies.
Louisa sensible head on her shoulders. collects socks.
Louise real babe, bright too, I'd drink her bath water.
Lucy strange dancer, wants to marry her dad. theif.
Madeline drives like a bloke, likes tractors.
Maggie trainspotter, likes plaid.
Margaret lovely mother, very generous.
Maria bangs like a barn door.
Marie life's slapper. Likes men to do DIY.
Marina no get up and go, rusty underwear.
Marilyn eats like a horse, out stays her welcome.
Martina ugly lesbian.
Martine can't act, can't sing, nice tits.
Matilda likes dancing, mainly the waltz.
Mary gets hurt easily.
Meg cheesy smell, should be spelt with an S.
Megan loves nature, cares more for trees than people. radical and gets things done.
Melanie can hold two bar vacuum orally indefinitely.
Melissa eats dogs, been in prison 6 times for burglary.
Meryl dances like an ape, doesn't realise.
Michaela likes animals, should make a video with them.
Michelle wears white stilettos, dances round her handbag.
Marsha big butt, small brain.
Monica doesn't swallow, should have.
Naomi wannabe diva, more of a diver.
Nancy white hair, remembers manners.
Natalie eats with her mouth open, farts the Nokia phone tune.
Natasha could use a face lift but is a sweet loyal friend
Nell hasn't realised WWII has ended, lives in Kent.
Nicola slapper, alcoholic in denial.
Nicole girls hate her, men use her and dump her.
Nikki loved up, eats cucumbers.
Nina stuffs her bra with tissues, been single for years.
Nisha hs a deep interest in the YMCA. falls in love easily.
Olga you can park a bike in her arsecrack, excessive facial hair.
Olivia neutron bomb.
Pamela gives amazing head, made of plastic.
Pat forest forager, likes wild boar.
Paula transvestite merchant banker from Basildon.
Penelope pit stop queen, likes men to be stiff.
Penny burps like a man, lives in dungerees and gets told to shut up alot.
Phillippa butt ugly lesbian.
Priscilla likes painting with oils, Duckhams mainly.
Rachel amazing gravity defying breasts, can grip a tenner in her arsecheeks.
Rebecca hairy armpits, orgasms without contact.
Rhia alcoholic, goes after mingers.
Rosie can be prickly, good head
Rula she measures up well.
Sacha believes carrots make you see in the dark, likes crotcheless knickers &
malteasers.
Sadie stand up if you're slim, please stand up.
Sally drives a Mustang, fights in pubs.
Samantha loves her brother, has four deformed children.
Sandra shags donkeys for fun, bow legged.
Sarah hangs around with the wrong crowd, Kinky in bed, loves porn.
Selina doesn't wear pants, heavy laundry bills.
Sharon shags like a locomotive, yo
Shirley can swallow a Curly Whirly whole, likes bananas.
Sian does mean sheep impression, hates mint sauce.
Simone used to be a shot putter from Cardiff.
Sonya dirty lady of the night. Often referred to as a carrier.
Sophie brothel madam, wears a wrinkly corset.
Stacey likes crotchless jeans and arseless Speedo's.
Steffi closet lesbian, maintains heterosexual relationship for effect.
Steph is a pretty, loved by her family and prince charming, has it all i.e spoilt daddy's
princess.
Stephanie eats Muppets, wears Brogues.
Sue totally gorgeous!
Tanya hot minx, too short.
Tara upper class slapper, needs extra chemicals.
Tiffany annoying and clingy. but makes up for it by being damn fit.
Tash lives about 10 seconds behind everyone in the world but makes up for it with her
tits
Tina face like a smacked arse, should eat less.
Tori lives in a hedge, can't water ski.
Tracy easily swayed by alcohol. Mostly seen without underwear. Loves kittens.
Tracey lesbian.
Ursula likes puppies, in curry.
Vic Likes to go commando. dreams of futures with lots of leather and men in thongs.
Victoria too smart for her own good and is insensitive to others.
Vicky likes Yoga and Men.Perfect in everyway. known to be very loud.
Vikki wears too much lipstick to taste food. runs after dumbarsed guys who don’t like her.
Wendy possibly a man.
Zara face like an elephant's backside. cant see her toes from breast enhancements.
Zoe talentless rock chick.

regards,

REB

[Footy Chick]

i'm not saying a word... think i'm a sitting duck here...

[Booney]

i'm not saying a word... think i'm a sitting duck here...

Do you trust me not to tell?

[JK]

i'm not saying a word... think i'm a sitting duck here...

It doesn't say SWIMS AWAY ...

[Footy Chick]

i'm not saying a word... think i'm a sitting duck here...

It doesn't say SWIMS AWAY ...

The 2nd part of mine would impress most men, wouldnt it???

[JK]

i'm not saying a word... think i'm a sitting duck here...

It doesn't say SWIMS AWAY ...

The 2nd part of mine would impress most men, wouldnt it???

Without question ... Second only to Joy ...

[Wedgie]

Without question ... Second only to Joy ...

Joy's my mum's name!

[JK]

Without question ... Second only to Joy ...

Joy's my mum's name!

I hear ya mate, my old lady's name is Lorraine

[Wedgie]

Without question ... Second only to Joy ...

Joy's my mum's name!

I hear ya mate, my old lady's name is Lorraine

lmao, Im just glad Mrs Wedgie and my daughter's name weren't on that list!

[Pseudo]

You shoulda finished the list with "88 lines about 44 women"

[Dissident]

My missus DEFINATELY can't sing.

[heater31]

i'm not saying a word... think i'm a sitting duck here...

It doesn't say SWIMS AWAY ...

The 2nd part of mine would impress most men, wouldnt it???

im too lazy to read through that and think at the same time

but getting your gear off FC impresses most men by the sounds of it *braces ones self and ducks for cover*

[Footy Chick]

i'm not saying a word... think i'm a sitting duck here...

It doesn't say SWIMS AWAY ...

The 2nd part of mine would impress most men, wouldnt it???

im too lazy to read through that and think at the same time

but getting your gear off FC impresses most men by the sounds of it *braces ones self and ducks for cover*

Hence the avatar

[MagicKiwi]

I'll do the same as Mrs Wedgie, say my name's not on there because it's spelt differently.

[TroyGFC]

My miss'es is Rosie and no she doesnt.

[RustyCage]

My miss'es is Rosie and no she doesnt.

What, shes not picky?

[Booney]

"Rachel amazing gravity defying breasts, can grip a tenner in her arsecheeks"

FC?

[Footy Chick]

"Rachel amazing gravity defying breasts, can grip a tenner in her arsecheeks"

FC?

TRUE, but my name isn't Rachael

[Rik E Boy]

Do tell Booney LMAO

regards,

REB

[Booney]

"Rachel amazing gravity defying breasts, can grip a tenner in her arsecheeks"

FC?

TRUE, but my name isn't Rachael

LMAO

(pssst REB,as soon as I know,you will..!)