Things that give you the sh1ts

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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Lightning McQueen » Fri Sep 26, 2025 11:24 am

Spargo wrote:
Lightning McQueen wrote:Had a new starter commence on the 2nd, young lad, seemingly very intelligent and picked to job up well but has now developed the habit of being on his phone excessively.
Pulled a Friday sickie for the 2nd week in a row today to go with this wonderful attendance record over his 19 days:
Absent: 3
Left early: 5
Arrived late: 9


Apparently his missus works with @The Bedge


:lol: :lol:

At a previous job I had a chick ask me if I can supply her with a laptop so she could work from home, I said "what are you on about, you don't even work from work".

No shit, she would say "I've just gotta go over to despatch", I'd walk over there two hours later and she'd be sitting on someones desk flapping her gums away about absolute drivel.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Jimmy_041 » Fri Sep 26, 2025 11:36 am

Lightning McQueen wrote:Had a new starter commence on the 2nd, young lad, seemingly very intelligent and picked to job up well but has now developed the habit of being on his phone excessively.
Pulled a Friday sickie for the 2nd week in a row today to go with this wonderful attendance record over his 19 days:
Absent: 3
Left early: 5
Arrived late: 9


I had one of those.
His dad worked in the same company and I was asked for a favour & employ him
Laziest f***er in the world
Pull a sickie and turn up the next morning with a haircut
He would turn up late and turn his compuer off at 4.50pm & sit there doing nothing for 10 minutes
So I started giving him work at 4.50am saying he had to finish it before he left
He complained to his father who was smart enough not to talk to me
Rolled in at 10am one morning saying the electricity went off so his alarm clock didn't work "Yeah right mate. But your phone is fully charged"
He never made it to 30 days probation but they employed him elsewhere.
He didn't make it through the next 30 days either
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Booney » Fri Sep 26, 2025 11:47 am

1:23am phone rings, alarm company "Morning, one of the motion detectors in sector 4 is going off"

"Ok, something might have fallen over in the factory, leave it for now but if goes off again please call me"

1:29am "Gone off again"

"Ok, I'll go".

Alberton > Torrensville.

Call the security company on the way "Do you have a patrol nearby to meet me there?"

She calls back "They'd be 25 minutes". "Leave it, I'll be right" ( Baseball bat and torch in hand )

Roll around the corner and there's a car parked out the front with their parkers on. Hmmm....

All good, it's got PV in the back window, I doubt you get an Uber to rob a ajoint but hey, who knows.

Open the gate, get out for a walk around and all the windows are in order the doors are.....open.

1:48am call the police. They arrive around 2:00am. They tell me to get back in the car and they go in the fire escape door, walk around, I see their torches moving through the place and they come back out. All clear.

I got back into bed at 2:50am.

One of the lads had left the fire escape door he uses at lunch to go out for a smoke open. He's been chatted to this morning.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Lightning McQueen » Fri Sep 26, 2025 12:56 pm

Jimmy_041 wrote:
Lightning McQueen wrote:Had a new starter commence on the 2nd, young lad, seemingly very intelligent and picked to job up well but has now developed the habit of being on his phone excessively.
Pulled a Friday sickie for the 2nd week in a row today to go with this wonderful attendance record over his 19 days:
Absent: 3
Left early: 5
Arrived late: 9


I had one of those.
His dad worked in the same company and I was asked for a favour & employ him
Laziest f***er in the world
Pull a sickie and turn up the next morning with a haircut
He would turn up late and turn his compuer off at 4.50pm & sit there doing nothing for 10 minutes
So I started giving him work at 4.50am saying he had to finish it before he left
He complained to his father who was smart enough not to talk to me
Rolled in at 10am one morning saying the electricity went off so his alarm clock didn't work "Yeah right mate. But your phone is fully charged"
He never made it to 30 days probation but they employed him elsewhere.
He didn't make it through the next 30 days either


It's this generation, worst part is that I really liked the lad, a few of my staff were getting the shits on with him but I was encouraging them to give him time.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Jimmy_041 » Fri Sep 26, 2025 1:15 pm

Booney wrote:1:23am phone rings, alarm company "Morning, one of the motion detectors in sector 4 is going off"

"Ok, something might have fallen over in the factory, leave it for now but if goes off again please call me"

1:29am "Gone off again"

"Ok, I'll go".

Alberton > Torrensville.

Call the security company on the way "Do you have a patrol nearby to meet me there?"

She calls back "They'd be 25 minutes". "Leave it, I'll be right" ( Baseball bat and torch in hand )

Roll around the corner and there's a car parked out the front with their parkers on. Hmmm....

All good, it's got PV in the back window, I doubt you get an Uber to rob a ajoint but hey, who knows.

Open the gate, get out for a walk around and all the windows are in order the doors are.....open.

1:48am call the police. They arrive around 2:00am. They tell me to get back in the car and they go in the fire escape door, walk around, I see their torches moving through the place and they come back out. All clear.

I got back into bed at 2:50am.

One of the lads had left the fire escape door he uses at lunch to go out for a smoke open. He's been chatted to this morning.


How come it took til 1.23am for the alarm to go off? :-?
I'd be chatting to the security company as well
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Lightning McQueen » Fri Sep 26, 2025 1:37 pm

Jimmy_041 wrote:
Booney wrote:1:23am phone rings, alarm company "Morning, one of the motion detectors in sector 4 is going off"

"Ok, something might have fallen over in the factory, leave it for now but if goes off again please call me"

1:29am "Gone off again"

"Ok, I'll go".

Alberton > Torrensville.

Call the security company on the way "Do you have a patrol nearby to meet me there?"

She calls back "They'd be 25 minutes". "Leave it, I'll be right" ( Baseball bat and torch in hand )

Roll around the corner and there's a car parked out the front with their parkers on. Hmmm....

All good, it's got PV in the back window, I doubt you get an Uber to rob a ajoint but hey, who knows.

Open the gate, get out for a walk around and all the windows are in order the doors are.....open.

1:48am call the police. They arrive around 2:00am. They tell me to get back in the car and they go in the fire escape door, walk around, I see their torches moving through the place and they come back out. All clear.

I got back into bed at 2:50am.

One of the lads had left the fire escape door he uses at lunch to go out for a smoke open. He's been chatted to this morning.


How come it took til 1.23am for the alarm to go off? :-?
I'd be chatting to the security company as well


I got in just before midnight and it was a pretty still night.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Booney » Fri Sep 26, 2025 1:54 pm

Jimmy_041 wrote:How come it took til 1.23am for the alarm to go off? :-?
I'd be chatting to the security company as well


When we set the alarm if the door is open it doesn't trigger the alarm to go off, my guess is a cat ( we have a family in the yard under one of the containers ) came in and triggered the sensor.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby mighty_tiger_79 » Fri Sep 26, 2025 5:06 pm

Lightning McQueen wrote:
Jimmy_041 wrote:
Lightning McQueen wrote:Had a new starter commence on the 2nd, young lad, seemingly very intelligent and picked to job up well but has now developed the habit of being on his phone excessively.
Pulled a Friday sickie for the 2nd week in a row today to go with this wonderful attendance record over his 19 days:
Absent: 3
Left early: 5
Arrived late: 9


I had one of those.
His dad worked in the same company and I was asked for a favour & employ him
Laziest f***er in the world
Pull a sickie and turn up the next morning with a haircut
He would turn up late and turn his compuer off at 4.50pm & sit there doing nothing for 10 minutes
So I started giving him work at 4.50am saying he had to finish it before he left
He complained to his father who was smart enough not to talk to me
Rolled in at 10am one morning saying the electricity went off so his alarm clock didn't work "Yeah right mate. But your phone is fully charged"
He never made it to 30 days probation but they employed him elsewhere.
He didn't make it through the next 30 days either


It's this generation, worst part is that I really liked the lad, a few of my staff were getting the shits on with him but I was encouraging them to give him time.

Must be related to Bedges colleague??
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby locky801 » Thu Oct 02, 2025 4:58 pm

Outdoor press conferences ona windy day

The one just done by SAPOL on the murder down south is downright embarrassing for both SAPOL and the media

all you can here is the wind blowing for 7 minutes :oops: :oops:
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby mighty_tiger_79 » Mon Oct 06, 2025 5:48 am

hayfever more of an impact the last few days than the last few years :? even with the pills
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby CENTURION » Wed Oct 08, 2025 12:17 pm

Banner ads are back! I have a brand new computer & they've re-appeared! How do I get rid of them again?
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Booney » Wed Oct 08, 2025 12:20 pm

CENTURION wrote:Banner ads are back! I have a brand new computer & they've re-appeared! How do I get rid of them again?


Call security. 8)
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby am Bays » Wed Oct 08, 2025 12:30 pm

CENTURION wrote:Banner ads are back!
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby wenchbarwer » Wed Oct 08, 2025 12:31 pm

That your Sigma?
my yes be yes, my no be no
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby am Bays » Wed Oct 08, 2025 12:32 pm

wenchbarwer wrote:That your Sigma?


The Missus'
Let that be a lesson to you Port, no one beats the Bays five times in a row in a GF and gets away with it!!!
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby CENTURION » Wed Oct 08, 2025 12:35 pm

wenchbarwer wrote:That your Sigma?


It's a Magna
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby wenchbarwer » Wed Oct 08, 2025 12:36 pm

CENTURION wrote:
wenchbarwer wrote:That your Sigma?


It's a Magna


I stand corrected, so it is
my yes be yes, my no be no
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby CENTURION » Wed Oct 08, 2025 12:44 pm

Booney wrote:
CENTURION wrote:Banner ads are back! I have a brand new computer & they've re-appeared! How do I get rid of them again?


Call security. 8)


I'll give you a crayfish :D
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Brodlach » Wed Oct 08, 2025 12:55 pm

CENTURION wrote:Banner ads are back! I have a brand new computer & they've re-appeared! How do I get rid of them again?

Download Ad Block
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Dutchy » Wed Oct 08, 2025 3:18 pm

My memory failing in my old age...yesterday on our team meeting we all agreed on dates for our face to face catch up in Perth on 5th & 6th November so arrangements commenced immediately for those dates, only for me to realise at 10.30pm last night that I had the Metallica tickets for the 5th :oops:

Groveling to my boss and team this morning to push it back 24 hours so I could do both, thankfully it has worked out by me copping the 6.30am flight on the Thursday, daylight savings has helped so I should get to Perth office around 8am, going to be a long 24 hours but glad its worked out.
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