Best age to become a parent/grandparent

[nuggety goodness]

Mrs NG is now into her third trimester and will be pumpin out a little bundle of Nuggety Goodness in late Jan/early Feb.

At that point I will be just shy of 25 and Wifey 23. Now i was thinkin about my mum, she'll be 44 when the little one is born. She was almost 20 when she had me.

I remember when i was in my mid teens her saying she wanted to be 45 before she was a grandparent (at my wedding she said her minimum was 40 so she was bustin my chops for a honeymoon baby, anyway...)

My dad is in Melbourne and we have more of a mates relationship but that's another thread. he's engaged to a girl who's my age and me and Wifey call her mummy Maz but that's soon to be Nanna Maz (funny to us anyway)

the point NG!!!

what is a good age to become a parent or grandparent?

I think we're about right. Mature enough (well supposed to be), responsible and by the time our kids are runnin amok we'll still be in a position to keep up with them.

My plan is 3 kids before i'm 30, so i'll still be under 50 when the youngest is leavin home and me and Mrs NG still have some life in us!

Obviously each to their own and all that and there's no right and wrong but I can't imagine waiting until your 30+ to have kids and I really hate the idea of kids having kids (insert flight of the conchords russian doll joke here).

For me ideally 23+ to be a parent and 46+ to be a grandparent.

[The Ash Man]

so i'll still be under 50 when the youngest is leavin home

You realise that the average kid leaves home at 27 nowadays!!

[nuggety goodness]

so i'll still be under 50 when the youngest is leavin home

You realise that the average kid leaves home at 27 nowadays!!

lucky my kids won't be average!!!

[whufc]

Best age that is best to be a parent, would be an individual answer that only you would know for yourself.

My circumstances is that i am 27 years old have a 2 year old daughter and another due in May.

Both me and the wife are employeed full time so are financially 'stable' definatly not rich though.

I have a problem in that i have chronic osteo arthirtis in my lower back, i am still able to play cricket and can get through a amatuer league game of soccer but are then generally to sore to train throughout the week. Arthritis runs through my family so is probably only probably going to get worse.

I really wanted to be able to spend lots of time playing sports and outdoors with my children therefore my best option was to have kids slightly earlire than planned (25).

For me its the best decision i have ever made as i can still do all the things i want too and be active with my child, spent 4 hours walking around Gorge Wildlife park yesterday with her, i dont know if i will be capable of that in 5 years time.

Its a personal decision mate if you are happy and prepared to be the best possible father you can thats all that matters.

[JK]

Best age that is best to be a parent, would be an individual answer that only you would know for yourself.

Spot on I reckon.

Im 38 and have 2 sons, aged 20 months and 3 months.

Ideally I had always wanted to have kids in my early 20's and when that didn't work out I'd hoped it would be my late 20's, but I wasn't prepared to have children without a stable partner, and just for the sake of having kids.

Once I hit my 30's I expected that it wasn't going to happen for me and I made peace with that, but then of course life can change quickly and unexpectedly.

The difficult part of having children at my age is sometimes the energy levels, and mostly that I wonder how Im going to go kicking the footy around with my lads, with 2 ordinary knees and a rooted hip.

The positive is, that Im not sure I would have been responsible enough in my 20's to be as good a parent as I would have liked .. I'll never know the answer, but on one hand your children just automatically make you more responsible if they mean enough to you, but on the other hand I had a fair penchant for getting off the rails in my 20's.

Life is what it is though and you live with your decisions and take that which is beyond your control and deal with it.

Always hard to put a label of "ideal timing" on things, when your own personal experiences don't include all of the alternatives.

[A Mum]

My mum had me when she was 18.
I had my first one when I was 20 - second one when I was 23 - third one when I was 26 (all planned)

We definitely were/are not rich either - money would have helped - but I brought my kids up on the basics and love - hence anything they get/got they (mostly) appreciate.

I loved having the kids young and almost felt like I was born to be a mum...lol.... in fact if it didn't mean a bigger car, and bigger house, and bigger this and bigger that I would probably have gone for a number 4 child.

Now my son is following in my footsteps - becoming a dad at 20 (his partner is older than he though)
Which means I am a grandma at 41.

Love it - and wouldn't change a thing.

Even my sons partner can't believe how hands on my son is with their new baby.
He is so committed to this baby and I can tell they are both going to be really great parents.

So I suppose I don't think age is an issue at all (well unless you're like 16 or something..lol) - I think if you're responsible, loving and committed that's all you need really.

While I still cringe at some of the things kids of today get up to etc, I think having had my kids younger there is less of a generation gap.

Well that's me

[piccachu]

i think financial stability plays a big part in it.

[Dogwatcher]

Three words.
When you're ready.

Because of my upbringing, I went from never getting married and never having kids, to finding that as I matured I was ready to do those things. I'm glad I changed my mind.

[MW]

Had mine at 28, 30 and 34.
I'd say 26-35 is about the right age range. Not only physically but financially. And by financially I mean getting the mortgage down a bit first.

[TEX07]

Im 32 and have a three year old son and a one year old daughter, for me this was the perfect age. I enjoyed being selfish during my twenties and by the end I was ready to settle down and enjoy my next phase in life. I have many mates who had kids young and lways say it will be great because by the time they are in thier late thirties thet kids will be old enough to look after themselves, i was happy to have that freedom in my twenties. Now that i am 32 I dont want to do all those things that I did when i was younger. Having said this it is each to their own, if you are lucky enough like we were to plan your family then you can do it as you feel, sometimes life isnt that easy and things happen earlier or later in life. In the end you get the same result and im sure without any regrets.

[fisho mcspaz]

I was 20 when my first was born; 25 with my second. Neither were planned. I was not ready to have a kid when I was 20 - I didn't have any money for one thing, I was a bit of a party animal and the person who was the father was not ideal. It was incredibly difficult after Angus was born as we went to America and I had no support there - no family or friends and I was not allowed to go out of the house. My in-laws were there but their help always felt like more of a power struggle, like I'd say 'I'm very tired because Angus isn't sleeping' and Mom would reply 'Well, I'll look after him this morning then. He ALWAYS sleeps for ME.' But I did my best and I learnt a whole lot and over the next two years I changed my life radically in order to be a good mother. When Luke was born this year, I think I was definitely ready this time around; I had a stable family environment for Luke, I had a great relationship with Luke's dad and I don't know, I guess I had a lot more patience or something, because everything went so much more smoothly this time around! It helps having our families around too, keeps us sane. And Mr McSpaz is a great dad - he changes nappies, gets up at all hours of the night, etc. Angus' dad was hopeless - he was afraid to hold Angus in case he dropped him, he vomited into a bin the first time he had to change a nappy and thus he never attempted to change one again, and he would go and sit in the toilet for three hours at a time (not kidding, I timed him once because I was so annoyed and it was 3:17 or something!) just to get away from us.

The funny thing is that I'd said that I wanted to finish my Ph.D before thinking about having any more kids. But when I got knocked up with Luke, I was so pleased. I do think that we were ready to have another child and that Luke's addition to the family has been fantastic for all of us. We get so much out of the time we spend with him. Angus dotes on his baby brother and we're considering having Number Three a couple of years down the track.

As for grandparents, I don't know what the 'right' age would be - my mum was 48 and my dad was 52 when they became grandparents, but I don't think it would have made much difference if they'd been younger or older. My dad's such a grouchy bugger, always has been, and he'll be just the same when he's eighty except maybe with a walking stick to brandish at the neighbourhood kids when they walk over his lawn.

[Dogwatcher]

As for becoming a grandparent - I think the best time is when you can finally admit to yourself that they are having sex and that they are adult enough to deal with the consequences.
As I'm now the father of two girls, I think they'll be about 30 by the time I do that.

[gossipgirl]

For me I had my first at 43 and will be having my second at 45. Age is just a number

[Booney]

I became a Dad just shy of my 21st Birthday, I'm now 35 and my son 14, I wouldn't change it for the world.

My daughter, 10 this Sunday however.....No . Love them both to bits and would not change my situation for quids.

Whats good/great for me is of little or no consequence to the next person though, this discussion is as unique as its participants.

[LMA]

Definately an individual point of view but personally I think if planning kids late 20's, early 30's usually one's had a bit of life experience, a career path and some financial stability by then and your still young enough to have a bit of fun once they've grown up. I was 23,26 and 28 and the now wife was 20,23 and 25 none of our's were planned and as I was only a casual worker and the missus never really worked for the first two we had no money to get the head start you need in the expensive journey of raising kids.

[Strawb]

I became a dad at 23 for the first time best two hours of my life (Cooper was born prem). Then two years later Mrs. Strawb gave birth to the twins so at 25 I became a dad to twin boys. and now 29 and sometime after Dec we will have our first baby Girl.

[Lunchcutter]

geez in this new age we live in, is there an "ideal" age I wonder .... more of a matter of personal opinion I would say

[Media Park]

Media Parkette is just over 16 months old, and I am 23.

My story is very different, so I'll just play the straight bat and say that I love her, and my bi-annual visit is a highlight of my year, but if I had a time machine, she wouldn't be here.

[Dog_ger]

I am 53.

My kids are 33 & 31.

My Grandkids are 13 (Step Grand Daughter), 11 & 9.

Waiting for the 1st Great Grand Child.

Never Looked Back. I am Happy.

Would You Change Anything In Your Life...? NOT ME.

[Big Phil]

I've just turned 29 and the wife is 35 next March...

We have decided to start 'trying for a family' in the next few months as the missus said the Doc told her her 'body clock is ticking' and the older she is, the more the risk for both baby and Mum...

I've been wanting to (and have felt ready to) have a kid for probably the last 2 years but we had to get married first and get some cash saved up. Can't wait to start trying now