REB Songbook - CRuD Fernando

[Rik E Boy]

CRuD Fernando*
(to the tune of “Fernando” by Abba)

Can you hit the pitch Fernando?
I remember long ago another dud as poo as this
In the spotlight Fernando
You were talking to yourself and crying on your way back to your mark
I could hear the distant chants
And sound of mass catcalls as you were hit out of the park

You’re no closer now Fernando
Every over every hour Australia seemed to score so freely
Sorry, but I’m afraid Fernando
The pitch is dead not full of life and minnows don’t prepare you for the ride
And I am not ashamed to say
The fours of our batting guns make me wonder why you’re in the side

There was nothing in the pitch that day
Your poo we slay, Fernando
They were hitting him for four and three,
One Fifty , for Fernando
Well we knew that we could never lose
Put on your bets
In the next test they picked him again
The batsmen’s friend - Fernando

When you’ve had your day Fernando
When many years have passed without the ball in your hand
Could you hit the pitch Fernando?
Do you still recall that you were part of Murali’s one man band?
I can hear it your sighs
At least you didn’t throw and your action was not banned

There was nothing in the pitch that day
Your poo we slay, Fernando
They were hitting him for four and three,
One Fifty , for Fernando
Well we knew that we could never lose
Put on your bets
In the next test they picked him again
The batsmen’s friend - Fernando

There was nothing in the pitch that day
Your poo we slay, Fernando
They were hitting him for four and three,
One Fifty , for Fernando
Well we knew that we could never lose
Put on your bets
In the next test they picked him again
The batsmen’s friend – Fernando

Regards,

REB

*Apologies to ABBA

[silicone skyline]

This is brilliant

[Rik E Boy]

DOH. Now Fernando has just got Haydos out. I'm going to look clever if he gets a bag today.

regards,

REB

[smac]

No matter what happens in the cricket, that's still gold REB.

[smithy]

Have you kept all your songs from over the years REB ?
There's one I'd particularly like if you still have it..

[Rik E Boy]

Er which one?

regards,

REB

[smithy]

TWas originally written by Flash and the Pan.....Hey....Saint....Peter
If you have it can you PM it to me please....it wont get posted on here publically..

[Rik E Boy]

TWas originally written by Flash and the Pan.....Hey....Saint....Peter
If you have it can you PM it to me please....it wont get posted on here publically..

It's already on this site Smiffy.

viewtopic.php?f=1&t=8564&st=0&sk=t&sd=a&start=20

Not a bad thread that one.

regards,

REB

[smithy]

Oh thanks REB.
I thought it was a footysa tune..
Thanks for that

Smithy

[mal]

It takes 2 hands to handle a batter.
Phil batters the bowlers coz hes Hungry Jaques

[mal]

MURALI with his lack of wickets might be singing
" I WANT 'KANDY'."

[smithy]

And in the showers afterwards...


I see you baby, shakin' that vaas.

[MatteeG]

Nice smithy... better than yelling "Hi ho Silva- Away"

[Dogwatcher]

How about this for the first line of a song....


Throw Muralichucker Throw

Maharoof, Maharoof, Maharoof ain’t on fire,
Maharoof, Maharoof, Maharoof ain’t on fire,
Maharaoof, Maharoof, Maharoof ain’t on fire,
We don't have any other bowlers throw Muralichucker throw,
Throw Muralichucker throw.

[spell_check]

How about this for the first line of a song....


Throw Muralichucker Throw

Maharoof, Maharoof, Maharoof ain’t on fire,
Maharoof, Maharoof, Maharoof ain’t on fire,
Maharaoof, Maharoof, Maharoof ain’t on fire,
We don't have any other bowlers throw Muralichucker throw,
Throw Muralichucker throw.

This one's not bad from the master, regarding Murali on the last Australian tour of Sri Lanka:

CRICKET
I Don't Like Murali
By Rik E Boy
Thursday, 11 March 2004

To the tune of 'I don't like Mondays' apologies to The Boomtown Rats.

I Don’t Like Murali

The track at Galle got inside our heads
It looked like a dusty road
And nobody wants to bat all day
Why can’t they doctor tracks at home?
And Johnny doesn’t understand it
It’s just not like the green and gold
Cos it’s been a shit season
A real non-season
And what would today’s reason be (moan)

Tell me why
I don’t like Murali
Tell me why
I don’t like Murali
Tell me why
I don’t like Murali
He’s gonna shoot (shoooot)
The whole side down

The Cricinfo machine is tough and mean
it types of gnomes to a waiting world
Alfie’s mother wasn’t shocked
When JL blocked
As Slat’s mum’s thoughts turn to
Her own little girl
Out for 16 in to the nightclub scene
Ball moved off the seam now he’s off the team
Cos it’s been a shit season
A real non-season
And what would today’s reason be (moan)

Tell me why
I don’t like Murali
Tell me why
I don’t like Murali
Tell me why
I don’t like Murali
He’s gonna shoot (shoooot)
The whole side down

All the Aussies are out at the test ground now
The chucker’s got his scalps the dirty rat
And the team’s out early and we should be learning
That the lesson today is how to bat
But while the captain’s spewing
What the hell was he doing?
All of a sudden we want Tugger back
Cos it’s been a shit season
A real non-season
What were the reasons why played like that?

Tell me why
I don’t like Murali
Tell me why
I don’t like Murali
Tell me why
I don’t like Murali
He’s gonna shoot (shoooot)
The whole side down